I subscribe to various self help and personal development newsletters. I like reading about positivity and such.

But sometimes I cannot help but think that there may be a problem with a lot of the self help articles out there.

The authors do mean well. But I am a bit tired of having to “grade” various areas of my life. They want you to assess your happiness and personal relationships among other things. Usually this is on a scale of one to ten or you use little stars or happy faces or something. Hmmm.

Here’s the thing.

I don’t think your life is a worksheet.

Isn’t this practice of always assessing things a bit subjective? In the morning things are good. Later in the day after an argument with your partner, not so much. I mean, things in life are almost always changing.

Last week I felt really good about my finances. Then after a 1000.00$ car repair estimate, that changed. Oh well. I deal with it.

Who are you comparing your life with. Your neighbors? Your co workers? Your siblings?

You need to stop comparing your life to others.

The other thing is, if you do grade your life on a scale, are you ever going to make it to a ten?

Even the so called professional motivational speakers may not want you to get there. They want you to keep coming back for more of what they are selling.

Now if there is some level of dissatisfaction in your life, then by all means you should work to improve these areas in whatever way works best for you and your family.

But what if you flipped your feeling of dissatisfaction on its head and came to realize that your life is already perfect.

You have to learn to be content with who you are and what you have. Can you strive to be better in some areas? To make improvements? Of course.

But maybe your life is pretty darn good for you.

There is no “perfect” life out there anyway. So stop worrying about getting there.

You have clothes, shelter and food(and probably a lot more than this). So sit still and listen to the birds. Watch the sun come up. Smell the leaves as they are now falling. Hear your kids as they laugh(or argue). Go for a walk with your partner. Enjoy a favorite book or TV show. Breathe.

Hey I do have areas I would like to change. I am single and have been for some time. Maybe it would be nice to find someone to share fun times with. But my life is still perfect NOW. If I meet someone, it will be perfect then as well. Not because of them, but with them.

Make the conscious decision to be happy.

Remember, your life is not a worksheet.

“Live Simply”

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9 thoughts on “The Problem With Most Self Help Articles

  1. I really like this post. Can I pinch those words “Not because of them, but with them”.
    Love it!!! I have so much I want to wite on a subject that ties in with this post so well. Can I put a link to this post when I finish writing it?
    Cheers, Wendy
    PS – how is the gluten free diet going?

    1. Yes of course you can “pinch those words”:) And feel free to link to the post when you compose your article.

      The gluten free diet is going very well. Lots of vegetables, fruit, lean protein, olive oil, sesame oil and walnuts. I am not the kind of person who needs too much variety. Makes it a bit easier.

  2. The goal is not to compare ourselves with others (which results in vanity or bitterness) but with our previous selves.

    Setbacks aside, I’m feeling stronger every day.
    Thanks for your post.

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