“Wherever you go, there you are.”

I want to start over. I need a new life. I want to go somewhere far away.

I cannot shake this desire I have of selling everything and starting over. I have blogged about it before. 

I have mentioned many times that I have a great life. I really do. But there is just something about starting over that appeals to me.

I realize that this is probably due to a number of different factors such as

There are probably more reasons that i think that selling everything and starting over would be “better”. In my head I know that the “grass is always greener on the other side”. But my heart just cannot seem to let go of this idea.

I Feel That Stuff Is A Burden

I live in a smallish 2 bedroom apartment. It is nice and ridiculously affordable. I don’t really have too much stuff compared to most people. But I still feel that the stuff I still have is a burden. It weighs me down. I would love to get a dumpster and just toss most of it but of course that would be wasteful.

Maybe just continuing to  declutter and get rid of things will help alleviate this desire to leave. Maybe.

I Feel Stuck

Make no mistake. I know that feeling “stuck” is my own doing. I have made certain choices that have led me to where I am right now. And where I am isn’t bad at all. It is just a bit stagnant I guess. I could make changes to spice things up of course and I will explore this as Winter moves into Spring. But making a clean break and starting over in a completely new place is much more appealing. A dream perhaps, but appealing nonetheless.

A Simple Life

I love the internet. The ability to learn about anything is incredible. Last night I was researching the history of language. It was fascinating. But I know that I spend too much time looking at a screen. Could I do without it? Could starting over somewhere else and living a life without being online actually work? Just reading books and hiking and sitting quietly in nature. I love the idea of living a simple life.

Couldn’t I do this now? Yes and no. As a substitute teacher I can only see available jobs via an online system. So if I want to work on any given day I need the internet.

Of course I should read more and sit in nature but when you are used to your routine it can be hard to make this habits stick.

So what is holding me back from taking the big leap of getting rid of everything and taking off?

What Is Holding Me Back?

It’s inspiring to pore over travel blogs searching for the ultimate lifestyle destination and it’s fun to read books about other people’s travel adventures. But what if you try and it all goes wrong? What if those horror stories people keep telling you about con men, tropical diseases and other travel disasters happen to you? What if the naysayers are right and you try it then fail then have to come back with your tail between your legs?

So of course fear of failure is a big factor in not doing it. As it guilt. I do have parents who live in the same town as me and I see them regularly. I would feel guilty about leaving and not seeing them.

Same with my kids but they are grown and living their own lives so that is to a lesser degree.

Money isn’t a factor. Not because I am wealthy. I have enough to relocate and I know I can do something to earn money. It is not wealth I am looking for. Hell, I would volunteer if it meant I had a place to stay and a bit of food. Yes, I am a serial dreamer.

If it did not work out I can always come back.

Does anyone else feel this way? Of selling everything and starting over? Has anyone actually done it?




15 thoughts on “Selling Everything And Starting Over

  1. I’ve started over a few times, and it’s a high like no other, especially minimizing down to what can fit in a car or a carry-on. Alas, after a few weeks or months of light living, the reasons why you had your old stuff start trickling back in and for good reason: a barbell set at home saves you at least 30 minutes a day of gym nonsense; an external monitor, keyboard, and mouse allow computer time to be maximally productive; a bicycle is a fun and nearly free way to do short errands; and there is no such thing as bad weather, only inadequate clothing. If you’ve been a minimalist for any significant length of time, most of what you have is useful. We’re tool-using animals; we’re cyborgs; we’re in the 21st century. Avail yourself of (select) stuff to live a smarter life.

    Almost all long-term travelers eventually set up a home base, where they can make full use of the efficiencies of modern life to focus on doing, making, building, designing, self-actualizing, and so on. Keep a place or carve out some room at your parents’, but whatever you do, don’t over-minimize. “Less is not more; just enough is more.”

    1. Wonderful insight Scott!
      Well I am 48 so being at my parent’s isn’t much of an option lol.
      I certainly understand your points. I do not want to be a nomad. I have done some “longer term” travel if only for a couple of months at a time and as AMAZING as it is to be backpacking around other countries I always know I have my home base. I see others who are doing it LONG TERM. They had sold everything and kudos to them for doing that. I know my limitations. And yes having a base of some kind would certainly make sense for me. Thanks a lot for the awesome comment!

    1. Exactly! Why is that I wonder? For me I know on some level that maybe I am “running away” but is that so wrong? lol
      Also I consider myself a bit of a misfit. I don’t subscribe to the consumerist world most people in North America believe in. There are lots of layers to this feeling of wanting to get rid of it all and start over somewhere else.

      1. I think there are just some people with a strong desire to do more then they are doing now. Life is short……….some days I just want to keep on driving and see what adventure I can find! 🙂

  2. I enjoyed reading this, but the thought for myself scared me lol I’m a creature of habit. I’m a homebody. I don’t like a lot of stuff & declutter on a regular. I feel I already live a simple life. Starting over makes me feel anxious lol Now traveling however……I would love! Travel around in a cute lil gypsy wagon….yes! Lol

  3. I have twice done this moving to other countries to get work, leaving decluttered stuff in storage. I am over it. I decluttered again when I moved into this little flat and I want to stay where I am. I want to relax, not have to organise myself to other places.

    1. So true. It is so draining to have to keep decluttering and organizing. Hence my desire to get rid of everything. And at least live without stuff for a while and actually deal with my emotions etc. Heaven forbid!! lol

  4. I’ve started over several times and their is a definite high of newness and the opportunity for a fresh start, but that eventually dwindles down to the norm. I realized a couple years back that I kept looking for new to fix me (I also have dysthymia), but the same issues were still lingering beneath the surface. It was simply that all the new challenges and adjusting period covered it temporarily. Now I’m committed to dealing with what is beneath the surface so that I don’t feel that intense irritation that can flare up at times and demand that I start over. I want to get to a place where I am living in contentment, and I’m moving towards new experiences rather than away from others.

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